Waiting is the hardest part...

I've decide that doctors should not use words like "full term."  At 37 weeks, I finally feel 100% justified in my uncomfortable-ness.  Which means: my sense of decency has gone out the door.  I feel like I should be able to get away with murder...or at least this:

Yes, sadly this is me at work.  In a corporate office.  Where men wear suits and ties and women are often seen in dresses.  Worse than that, I'm not even embarrassed.

This week I went to the doctor and found out some amazing news...baby Pridgen is head down and weighs (give or take) 6lb 13oz.  He is pretty much ready.  Thank goodness!  And I definitely look like I'm about to pop:

I love this picture!  Mark's coworkers had a lunch shower for us last week at the art museum.  Bonus: my friend, Bree's, dad works there.  He snapped my picture to send to Bree, then took me on a personal tour of the Normal Rockwell exhibit after my lunch.  

I'm almost where I want to be at work (so no one gets left with my unfinished projects).  And the nursery is complete, minus wall decor.  We lack a baby bath tub, but should have all the other necessities.  Hear that, baby Al?  It's time!

Another "Hunger Games"

Last month, I forced myself to listen to (why does it make me feel guilty that I have to use the word "listen" instead of "read"?) "Divergent" by Veronica Roth, at the request of my book club.
I would say that it was a waste of time, but I was mostly in my car traveling back and forth to work.  And, maybe it was better for me (and the baby) than the rap songs I usually blare from my iPod...I know, I'm so gangsta.  So I will say that I just didn't enjoy it.  Why?
Well, let me back-up a little.  I really enjoyed the "Hunger Games" books and was told this was similar.  Was it?  Yes...too similar.  But in a lackluster kind of way.  Similar female character, but I couldn't identify with her.  Attractive love interest, but he didn't ignite the same kind of feelings as Peeta (or even Gale).  It just...wasn't quite...there.
In fairness, I was one of the few people who felt this way.  Maybe my expectations were too high.  If I've lowered yours enough, feel free to give it a try.

One Year Ago, The Time in Between, & Today

One Year Ago:

One year ago yesterday, I left the gym in a panic after seeing signs of a miscarriage.  I called my doctor on the way home, and she helped me make an appointment to check on everything in the morning.  When Mark got home I explained the situation, and he comforted me as I mourned the life I was already sure we had lost.

The next morning, a silent ultrasound confirmed what I suspected...at 10 weeks, we had lost our future child/little girl/fetus/embryo - it's hard to find the right word(s).  I elected to have a D&C surgery that afternoon and was sent home that evening.

It was weird having everything "taken care of" in less than 24 hours and was difficult to deal with the emotions of losing something I never really had but so desperately wanted.


The Time in Between:

The time in between that day and today hasn't been perfect.  I haven't been perfect.  I watched other people get pregnant and deliver healthy babies.  I thought of some of the mothers as "deserving" for various reasons...perhaps they had trouble getting pregnant or had suffered their own miscarriages.  It was the other group that I struggled with...the "oops" group and the "that was easy" group.

When my sister, Valerie, fell into the "that was easy" group, it hurt my heart.  But when my mom told me that Valerie was nervous to tell me she was pregnant, I realized that I wasn't the only person hurting.  I knew my sister felt almost guilty and didn't want to cause me anymore pain.  Her selflessness helped me realized how deserving she was, along with the other moms who loved their children whether they came easily or not.


Today:

Yesterday, I went to the doctor for a 33 week appointment.  Everything seems to be progressing well, and our little one is expected to be here on Christmas Day (though, I wouldn't mind if he picked another day)

I also spent the day with my new nephew, James.  He's a beautiful baby and I feel so much love whenever I'm around him.

 








It's incredible the difference a year can make.

Pregnancy Grammar

As this pregnancy begins to take over my brain, I've discovered that I no longer know the difference between:

-No & Know
-Too, To & Two
-Think & Thank
-Poll & Pole (which can be important if you work with electrical poles)
-There, They're, & Their

Also, I like to add letters to my words.  Maybe a "d" on the end, even when I'm speaking in present tense.  Or an "ly" just for fun.

Grammar friends, bare with me...and please keep reading my blog (which, let's be honest, has never been known for its grammar).

Showered (Part Deux)

This past weekend, some of my best friends got together to throw a shower for me.  One of my favorite things...they each picked-out a onesie for baby Al and I had to guess which one was from whom:

As you can see, there are a lot of Alabama Fans in this group, and they know what will make mom and dad happy! 

And here I am with my hostesses (minus Bree & Carrie who live out-of-town).  I just think my friends are the cutest!  And poor Valerie was running around like a crazy person at 9 months pregnant!

The sweet pillow was a surprise from my mom and will match the bedding for the nursery.

Also, my sweet friends/hostesses got me the baby carrier that I had been coveting.  I'll have to get a picture of Mark modeling it once Al get here, but for now you can see it on the actual model:

Isn't it great?  The baby can face in (as shown), out, or even piggie-back style.  I can't wait to use it!  And really, it was a perfect gift from them, as it'll probably help me get out of the house more to see them post baby.

Thanks ladies!  Now I am (almost) ready to be a mom...such a crazy concept still.

Showered (Part One)

Last weekend, Mark, Baby Al, and I were showered with love and gifts from friends and family.  We have been overwhelmed by everyone's generosity and support!  Some of my favorite pictures from the showers:

I'm not usually a "games at showers" kind of girl, but I loved watching the boys try to drink beer from a baby bottle.  Ben cheated and won (typical), but I think Will was our real winner. 

We also had everyone make a play-dough baby Al.  Mark was clearly serious about the judging! 

Here was most of our group for that shower.  But we did accidentally let a few (Hillary & Micheal, Lauren & Will, Patrick & Kristen) slip away before we took a group picture.  Ben, Drew, and I are proudly sporting our medals from some of the games we won!

The next day, some of my mom's friends hosted a joint shower for Valerie and me.  It was pretty special to be able to share the experience with my sister.

Though, admittedly, I've been pretty jealous of what a cute pregnant lady she is.

The picture above is of us with our sweet hostesses (and my mom & Ms. Christine).  My mom has been friends with these ladies for years.  Most of them are from their neighborhood, where they have lived for almost 35 years.  Others are YMCA friends, tennis friends, and such.  My mom has been VERY blessed in the friend department, and I have been fortunate enough to benefit from these amazing friendships too.

My mom, Valerie, me, & Ms. Christine 

These last two women are very important to me.  On the left is my friend Elizabeth's Siti.  Since we do so many family things with Elizabeth's family, I call her Siti too, as she is something of a grandmother to me also.  On the right is Mark's sweet Nanny.  I LOVE Nanny!  My grandparents all passed when I was fairly young and Nanny has become like a grandma to me (my dad even says she reminds him a little of his mom).

I didn't get any pictures of the beautiful decorations or Al's amazing gifts, but lets just say he has been spoiled already!

"My Back is Aching..."

Last week (and again last night) Mark and I went to see his nephew, Douglas, play pee-wee football, and I actually got a little chocked-up thinking "little Al will be out there one day".  That is, if his mother is brave enough to let him play contact sports.

It also reminded me of my days as a "Little Rebel" cheerleader.  Similar blue uniforms (even though this was a Chelsea team), hair tied with ribbons, awkward preteen girls just trying to fit in.  But the real shocker?  They are using the same cheers from about 18 years ago!  Even the ones with weird phrases like "my back is aching, my belts too tight, my booty's shaking from left to right."

Today, as I sit in my cubical - pregnant and uncomfortable - I have a new appreciation for that awkward cheer.  My back aches and everything feels too tight.  Luckily, I haven't developed the "pregnant waddle" yet...but it's only a matter of time until that kicks in and makes my booty shake from left to right.  Sigh, those tiny cheerleaders have NO idea!